


After All This Time

by orphan_account



Series: What's Become of Us [1]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: M/M, Mind Rape, Mind Reading, TFA torture scene, past relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-16
Updated: 2016-04-16
Packaged: 2018-06-02 15:56:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6572506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Poe had been told that his best friend and lover had died in the massacre at Luke's Jedi school along with everyone else. He's starting to wonder if that was all a lie meant to spare him of what truly happened.</p>
            </blockquote>





	After All This Time

Poe tugged at the restraints, groaning in frustration. He didn’t think he would be able to break out, but it was worth a shot.

When he looked up, he saw a hooded creature in the corner of the room. The infamous _Kylo Ren._ He rolled his eyes, but resisted the urge to taunt him. It was hard though, especially with so many things he could say about the man from the way he dressed, to the mask he wore-hid behind- to the fact he was hiding in the shadows.

The man-if he could even be called that-seemed tense, as if he were undergoing an intense struggle within himself. Then all of a sudden the entire atmosphere of the room changed, darkened. Ren seemed to loom over Poe as he walked over.

Poe could practically feel the rage, the hate, rolling off of him in waves.

Then he felt shards of the force cutting into his mind like broken pieces of glass. He tensed, trying to resist the intrusion, the _violation,_ of his mind.

His memories flashed by without his permission as Ren carded through them carelessly. Days from his flight school, parties after victories, everyday mundane things. Then, Ren seemed to stop on one fleeting image in particular.

Poe cursed internally, clenching his eyes shut as he willed himself to think of something, _anything,_ else. Not that, not _him._

But Ren was fixated on that memory. He dragged it out of the depths of Poe’s mind, pulling it to the forefront. He raked his jagged tendrils of the force over it. Poe could feel as hat single memory made Ren even angrier.

He didn’t know why, it was harmless. Just a day with his old best friend. Though at the time, they were more than that. He’d been playing with Ben’s hair, the younger boy's head resting in his lap, as he told him of the different planets they would go to when they were older, allowed to fly on their own.

His passion had always been flying, for as long as he could remember. It had been his first love. But when he’d met Ben-a gangly, awkward kid with too long limbs and not enough confidence-he could’ve sworn he’d fallen in love again.

Ben had been a good kid. A little standoffish and cynical, but he had a quick wit that could keep up with Poe’s humor, and he never told Poe his dreams were ridiculous.

When he’d gone to flight school, and Ben had left for Jedi training, he had expected that to be the end of their friendship. It hadn’t been. Instead, when he came back year’s later, they had only grown closer. Even knowing that they would soon be separated again.

The second night Ben was back, he and Poe stole the Millennium Falcon. They went to Naboo together-Ben had always loved it there; it made him feel connected to the grandmother he’d never known-and had stayed for hours. Poe knew that it wasn’t often Ben was allowed to travel, and he’d only been to Naboo once before when his parents had finally given into his pleading, so he was happy to do this for him.

It had been one of the best days in Poe’s memory. They’d run through the vast plains and swam through crystal clear lakes until the sun went down. Then they held each other silently beneath the stars, both savoring their brief time together, choosing not to think of how quickly it would end.

It had been the only day they truly had to themselves, not having to worry about anyone finding them. They could have done anything.

Ben was an anxious person, always having to worry about living up to his family legacy while not falling victim to the darkside like his grandfather had, never having a chance to relax and be himself. So Poe had taken him away from all of that for the night, leaving responsibilities and expectations behind. It was the most alive he could remember having ever seen Ben.

He’d never felt so shattered as the day he did when General Organa-really, she was almost a mother to him, not just his General-had told him that his best friend, his Ben, had died along with everyone else in the massacre at Luke’s school.

Ben was coming home soon, he’d made plans for them to go to Naboo again, this time for a week. He’d thought of all the things he wanted to tell him. And all of that had crumbled around him as Leia told him what happened.

The crushing reality that he would never see that boy again was almost too much to bear. So he had thrown himself into piloting, taking any and every mission he could, a part of him secretly hoping he wouldn’t make it back every time he got into his X-wing.

Eventually, he came to terms with it. Ben wouldn’t want him to take such risks. Ben had always chastised him against it, saying one day Poe’s confidence-recklessness, Ben had said- would get him killed.

Poe screamed in agony as Ren delved into his mind carelessly, raking though every one of his memories, tearing him apart from the inside out.

He screamed until his throat was raw and he could taste copper on his tongue. Sweat mixed with blood on his skin, dripping down his lips and chin in a single line as his nose started bleeding from the strin of having his thoughts picked apart.

Finally, it stopped. Ren pulled the tendrils of Force out of his mind slowly, almost gently, and Poe’s body went limp. He panted, head hanging and body trembling from the sheer pain he’d gone through. How long had they been there? Minutes? Hours?

Poe was given only a few moments of rest before he felt the Force being pushed into his mind again, taking root in his thoughts. It was slow, gentle, as if in apology for before. Ren carefully sifted through Poe’s thoughts until he found what he did with the map.

Poe didn’t resist. Couldn’t resist. He couldn’t even find the energy to lift his head and level Ren with a glare.

Ren stepped closer, extending a gloved hand to wipe away the blood dripping down Poe’s lips with his thumb. Poe didn’t say anything, didn’t try to lean away, just simply looked up at Ren.

He closed his eyes and clenched his jaw when that hand wasn’t pulled away, instead lifting to smear the blood over his cheek, before brushing his damp hair back.

No one had touched him like that since Ben. As if they cared, as if they didn’t want to see him hurt, to lose him.

That gloved hand stroked through his hair, and Poe found himself leaning into the touch, breathing a soft, inaudible sigh.

Then as suddenly as the kindness had come, it was gone, that momentarily kind hand clenching into a fist as it was pulled away. Poe expected to be hit, and was surprised when instead Ren turned from him.

As he walked, he finally spoke. Finally voiced his suspicion that had been in the back of his mind since Ren stopped on that one memory.

“Ben,” he said hoarsely, the single word stinging his throat.

He didn’t get a response, Ren didn’t even turn. Didn’t even stop.

Poe saw the way his shoulders tensed and he stood straighter. Even after all these years, that hadn’t changed.

 _“Ben,”_ he said again, throat still burning, voice still unrecognizable to his own ears.

He hoped that maybe, maybe, he would be able to reach the man, even after all this time.

He had the hope that he could bring him home, back to his family.

Ren didn’t stop. Didn’t turn. Didn’t say a single word, make a single sound, as he walked out, leaving Poe alone with his thoughts.

Poe left with the Stormtrooper that came for him, but not before he saw a cold black mask in the shadows hiding expressive brown eyes he used to know so well.


End file.
